Wanted: A new Haggadah for a family tired of the red-and-yellow Goldberg edition.
Must possess the following qualities:
- Reads right to left, regardless of the amount of English translation. Haggadot that open left to right need not apply.
- Mostly uses traditional God-language. None of this “we bless the womb of all life” business. My family and guests will laugh that kind of thing right out of the room.
- Good (not awkward) English translation.
- Some new/alternate texts (in English) that may generate interest among a crowd of jaded agnostic Jews.
- A layout that allows for easy reading of the text (no sidebars), i.e. we could go around the table taking turns, and everyone would know exactly where to start and where to leave off.
Attractive layout, illustrations, and pages that don’t absorb wine stains would be preferred, but not required. Wait, scratch that last one. Wine stains give the haggadah character.
See? I’m not asking much. Just… a haggadah.